Midlife crisis at 35: Is this a thing?

Midlife crisis at 35: Is this a thing?

I’m 33 years old, I’ve been married for 12 years and I have two children. I’ve been out on my own since the day after my 18th birthday, and I’ve been saying for years that I feel like a much older woman. But when I turned 30, that feeling started to seem a bit more like reality.

It wasn’t just the number, it was also the grey hairs and how different my body felt during a pregnancy at 30 compared to a pregnancy at 26, it was my sudden preference for the easy listening station on FM radio and my inability to relate to the college girls I see prancing about in the next town over.

While I don’t exactly take issue with any of these things, the cerebral realization that I no longer consider myself young has had an emotional effect on me, an identity-altering effect if I’m being completely honest.

I still have the desire to be appear youthful and be full of hope and promise, but the reality is, that person peaked at the age of 24. I don’t see myself that way anymore and neither does society. I’m someone else now, I’m just not sure who.

Also read: The benefits of “not making it” early on in life

Midlife crisis at 35: Is this a thing?

So here I find myself at a bit of a crossroads, something similar to what children experience as they enter adolescence, or perhaps even a midlife crisis.

I’m not technically old, but I have a distinct sense of being older — of no longer being young — and I don’t quite know what to make of that. I don’t know how to embrace it.

Sometimes I want to run out to the mall and buy all the trendy new makeup I can get my hands on, but most of the time I want nothing more than to be at home alone on the couch in my 15-year-old sweats with a glass of cab sav in hand.

I flounder around pretending I know what I’m doing, because I’m a grown-up and I’m supposed to, but oftentimes I feel just as green as ever before.

Is this something that happens at the start of every new life stage or is midlife extending to a younger generation as our culture continues to place a greater emphasis on youth and beauty over age and wisdom?

I’m not sure, but I’m hopeful I’ll find out before I am in fact “over the hill.”

The cerebral realization that I no longer consider myself young has had an emotional effect on me. #midlife #crisis #thirties

Shayne Rodriguez Thompson

Shayne is a freelance lifestyle writer with expertise in all things parenting, food and travel. She regularly contributes at MamasLatinas.com, CruiseCritic.com, independenttraveler.com and familyvacationcritic.com. Her career has allowed her to live out her passions while she raises her young family.