Being single in midlife; pros and cons

Being single in midlife; pros and cons

For many women, finding themselves middle aged and unattached, can be something of a downer.

On the one hand, you may be happy to be free of a burdensome and joyless relationship, but loneliness can creep in quickly.

Truth is, there are pros and cons to being single in midlife.

Ultimately though, it could be the perfect opportunity for reevaluation and new explorations. Here are some things to look out for, and others to look forward to:

The downside

• There’s a one-sided stigma.

The stigma of being a single woman over a certain age is alive and well.

No matter how youthful you feel inside and perhaps even appear on the outside, lots of folks still believe it’s close to impossible for a woman to find love after she’s reached a certain age.

Men, on the other hand?

The assumption is that they’re happy to settle for lust if love doesn’t materialize right away–and everyone seems okay with that.

• You May Feel Lost.

If you’ve spent the bulk of your adult life in one romantic relationship or another–never having spent much if any time single or dating–you may feel overwhelmingly out of place and unsure of where to start or even of what you truly want for yourself.

And the task of figuring that all out, even for just a moment, may seem monumental.

• There may be kids to consider.

When you were younger and single, you probably had very few limitations in life.

But now that you’re older and have possibly been through marriage and have maybe had a family, you’ll have to consider your kids in every decision you make.

Of course, they shouldn’t rule everything you do, but while you’re out discovering you, you still have to make sure they’re well taken care of emotionally and physically.

Never mind that if you do happen to find yourself in a new relationship, whomever you’re with will have to be willing to embrace your family.

Also read: Why do we stay in bad relationships?

Being single in midlife; pros and cons

The bright side

• You are free.

Without the attachment and demands of a significant other, you’ll have a lot more time on your hands.

Especially if you’re already well-established in your career and your kids are old enough to fend for themselves every now and then.

That means you are free to do a lot more self-exploration.

You can spend time uncovering your own interests, figuring out what you want for this stage in your life and deciding if and when you’re ready to pursue romance.

• Your opinion matters most.

From how to spend your bonus to where to spend your precious vacation time, you no longer have to check in with anyone else.

You get the final say. For this period of time no matter how extended or brief it may be, you can have and do exactly what YOU want.

This is the time to live out some of your dreams without anyone else quashing them.

• You’re not waiting to start your life.

When we’re young, everything is done in a hurry.

We’re in a hurry to finish school, so we can get a job as soon as possible, so we can make me money, so we can go out and find a mate, so we can get married, so we can start a family.

The clock is always ticking. But most likely, you’ve already been there and done that.

You can slow down and you can take time to enjoy the things in life you love the most.

Because even though you’re older, you’re not old and you’ve lived enough to know that you have a lot more living to do.

Only this time, you know how valuable your time, energy and resources are, and can truly make the most of them.

For many women, finding themselves middle aged and unattached, can be something of a downer. On the one hand, you may be happy to be free of a burdensome and joyless relationship, but loneliness can creep in quickly. Truth is, there are pros and cons to being single in midlife. Ultimately though, it could be the perfect opportunity for reevaluation and new explorations. Here are some things to look out for, and others to look forward to: #single #dating #midlife
Shayne Rodriguez Thompson

Shayne is a freelance lifestyle writer with expertise in all things parenting, food and travel. She regularly contributes at MamasLatinas.com, CruiseCritic.com, independenttraveler.com and familyvacationcritic.com. Her career has allowed her to live out her passions while she raises her young family.

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